Trek-erous Mockery: Deals 1 D7 Psychic Damage
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Trek-erous Mockery: Deals 1 D7 Psychic Damage ~
08/12/2025
Now With 30% More War Crimes!
It’s 2025 and War Criminals are back in fashion. Everybody is talking about them, whether we want to or not. They’re in the news, they’re in the white house. It’s only fitting they’ll soon be coming to Star Trek. Previously, a new audio drama titled “Star Trek Khan,” was announced with the goal of humanizing the genocidial maniac. To let Trek fans know, he was just misunderstood. He meant to slaughter and enslave millions in a global conflict, but he’s really a nice guy once you get to know him.
This past weekend at Star Trek Las Vegas, actor and former minor league baseball coach, Scott Bakula, teased a postential return to the franchise in a The-Competitor’s-Franchise-Has-Better-Writing-Than-Our-Franchise-style series, tentatively titled “Star Trek: We Don’t Understand Why Star Wars Is Popular.” Bakula’s first leap into Star Trek was during the 2001 series titled “Star Trek: Enterprise” where he played Captain Jonathan Archer.
Famously, as Archer, Bakula commanded the first Warp-5 starship, made contact with numerous alien species, and had mad gay sexual tension with one of them. Infamously, Archer committed heinous atrocities against the previously mentioned species, never addressed his trauma, nor was he confronted or reprimanded about his actions. Not on screen anyway because that doesn’t make for good television. It’s not like Star Trek does courtroom drama well.
Regardless, he laid foundation for what would be the Federation, all while terrorizing innocent species, having mad gay sexual tension with an Andorian, to become a celebrated hero, and escape accountability for his actions. And no, I’m not referring to the Mirror Universe episode. It seems in this new series, art imitates life as the unimpeachable criminal, Captain Archer, has been elevated to the role of President of the Federation.
Story by: The Orion
Faux Shaw
Death is of no consequence and Star Trek: Legacy is still a thing, apparently. This, according to Star Trek Writer, and body double for the sloth from Zootopia, Terry Matalas. The proposed series would see the return fan favorite Captain Shaw. What sorcery is this?!…, you might be asking if you’re from Hysperia. Time Travel Trickery? Transporter Clone capers? Changeling chicanery? None of the above! The pitched idea would see the dumbass from Chicago returned in the form of a Command A.I. or what we’re calling the Emergency What The Fuck Hologram.
Story by: The Orion
Subspace Wrap-up!
Greetings and Salutations,
I’m introducing a new section to the site - Subspace Wrap-up! I realize I post a lot of content on my socials which means many things can be missed. My spies… I mean, my informants… fans of this site deserve to be kept abreast of my many machinations. So, rather than searching through my mad, rambling posts, or all the way to the bottom of the Gallery I’ll post the new stuff here. Like most of my endeavors, this will be a work-in-progress. As always, thank you for your support.
Be excellent to each other,
~The Orion
UPDATES!
Something nerdy this way comes…
If you’re a casual visitor to this site, you might have noticed some recent changes. We’re finally in the testing phase to open our shop.
Woot!
There’s still some details to sort, but stay tuned!
(I guess those issues must be working business days because this is taking longer than I had anticipated.)
