Dave's Not Here, Man ~
Dave's Not Here, Man ~
04/21/2026
Don’t Be A Herbert, Herbert
Yesterday the galaxy joined in celebrating the only galactic holiday. No, not “Federation Day,” April 20th is the only officially recognized high-holiday throughout the four quadrants. A bit a slow news day, however, Captain Crunch of the USS Dorritos has reported an entire nebula of Mountain Dew Code Red has disappeared from the Milky Way galaxy. Admiral Ben N’jerry claim the thieves may have made a run for the boarder. Officials remain on high alert.
~The Orion
Yesterday’s News 04/14/2026
The New Bajoran Kai is WEAK on crime and terrible at Galactic Policy. I don’t want a Kai who thinks it’s OK for the Breen to have a Genesis Weapon and to meet with Federation Sympathizers. The Vedek Assembly needs to get their act together.
~Gul Dukat~
[Kai Winn has requested your location]
[Gul Dukat has logged off]
From The Mind of The Orion
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